foreign horror

TRAILER THOUGHTS: MARTYRS [2016]

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What a week. From working almost every day to sleeping the whole day, [because of work] this week has been torture. I’ve been insanely busy and when I do get a free minute, I don’t want to do anything productive. This of course, includes writing on here. But now, it’s been over a week since I wrote about the awesome horror novel Dwelling and I’ve been feeling antsy to get back into writing – so here we are.

Naturally, when I woke up this morning, I did my usual routine: make a coffee, turn on my computer, and search the Internet for new and exciting things that are happening in the movie world. The first thing I notice is today’s topic – and it’s something I’ve been meaning to go over in more detail; especially after it was announced. But now we have a trailer, and…I’m skeptical. Let’s talk about it though, let’s talk Martyrsthe remake.

If you’ve seen the original Martyrs film, [which is both fantastic as it is terrifying] you’ll no doubt notice that this trailer makes seems to look more like a mean-spirited take Pascal Laugier’s original 2009 French film. It also seems to take away a lot of the mystery that the original had, only to try and make it “scarier” by filling it will even more torment and violence. Is this a good thing? Not entirely. Out of curiosity, I looked up some of the reviews for early viewers of this remake, and many were unenthusiastic, saying it lacked the same intense feeling that the original had. Not to mention, the original pushed their R-rating, while this remake is getting PG-13 – so…there’s that. I’m not saying all PG-13 horror is bad, I mean Insidious, Gremlins, and even Fire In The Sky were all rated PG-13; and I love these films. I just feel this means that this version of Martyrs is going to dramatically toned down.

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As it turns out though, Anchor Bay recently set January 22, 2016 as a limited theatrical and Digital HD release of this reboot, which will eventually arrive on VOD, DVD and Blu-ray on February 2, 2016.. Feels kind of quick, doesn’t it? For those that don’t know what Martyrs is about – at least this version – here’s a plot synopsis and only you can be the judge if this movie sounds like your cup of tea. [or in my case; coffee]


Ten-year-old Lucie flees from the isolated warehouse where she has been held prisoner. Deeply traumatized, she is plagued by awful night terrors at the orphanage that takes her in. Her only comfort comes from Anna, a girl her own age. Nearly a decade later and still haunted by demons, Lucie finally tracks down the family that tortured her. As she and Anna move closer to the agonizing truth, they find themselves trapped in a nightmare – if they cannot escape, a martyr’s fate awaits them…


So does it seem worthwhile? I mean, maybe. I enjoyed the original [as extreme as it is] for what it was. It was violent, brave, and extremely horrific. This quick “Americanized” remake, seems to come off as toned down, but we won’t really know until it’s been watched. It has the same fearful elements of the original, but I can’t tell if there’s going to be the same horrific feeling that the came with the original French film. There’s already talks about how this remake is going to have a “happier ending to appease North American audiences”, so that alone has me concerned for the end result of this film.

If you find yourself to enjoy what I do on here, then please take a minute and follow me over on my Facebook page [it’s at over 128+ likes – only a few more and we’ll have reached over 130!] By clicking that “like” button, you’ll see every post from warrenisweird the very moment it’s been posted online; and I also share links to articles and pictures/videos that will not be featured here on the blog. Every “like” helps me a ton, giving me the ability to write more posts for you to read, so be sure to tell the horror enthusiast in your life to do the same, and share The Facebook Page with your family and friends!

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definitely not a film for those with a weak heart.

THANKS FOR READING.

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WEIRDO’WEEN #10: Let The Right One In [2008]

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Contrary to popular belief, not every vampires you see in the movies are over 1000 years old. Sometimes, they’re younger, say about 12 or 13.. except they’ve been 12 [or 13] for a long time! Wait a minute..this sounds familiar; too familiar in fact. [find out why this sounded so familiar here!] Let’s try this again..

Today, we’re going to talk about Vampires, and no, not those ones that involve shining in the sunlight, or living in the middle of the woods with their entire [adopted] families. I’m talking ones that need to drink blood to survive, and drift from place to place, before being discovered. But this can be tricky, because we are also talking about younger vampires in a foreign country. [this is starting to sound familiar too] Today’s movie came out in 2008 and already got itself a remake – which was surprisingly half-decent. Surely, if you’re a fan of the genre, you’ve already caught on to what movie were talking about today..or you flat out cheated, and read this post’s title! Either way, let’s not just watch just any vampire film that comes into our homes, let’s be sure we actually Let The Right One In. Also, this is weirdo’ween review #10 today, so that’s a thing worth celebrating too! [only 21 to go!]

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Based on the book of the same name, Let The Right One In is what I’d call a unique take on the typical vampire film. It’s technically a horror film, but it’s hard to class it as only that; it includes romantic elements, but also horror, kisses and love, but also blood and death. It has some brutal death scenes, but we never linger on it – it’s like the movie is trying to explain that it’s a necessity, but not the only thing we’re meant to be concerned with. It’s as if the vampire, is more human than the rest of us; that she just wants to be loved, and cared for. It could even be classified as a human movie, starring a vampire! But there is one thing we have to address..

In the film, Håkan [Eli‘s guardian/old lover]  butchers boys not much older than Oskar as a blood source for Eli. In this story, the storytelling is the most important theme to the point where we’re mostly meant to assume things, while some things are hinted and suggested at. There’s some questions that come up that are never answered. Why does Håkan pick these younger victims? Are they are Eli‘s preference? Then what does that say about Eli‘s sudden interest in Oskar? What is Eli‘s true nature? She tells us early on that she’s been twelve “for a very long time”, but we briefly glimpse her true physical age, which shows us that she is in fact, middle age; roughly the same age as Håkan. What about her gift to Oskar in the films last moments? Eli decides to go through with the brutal slaughter of his child tormentors. Entranced in her glamour, this of course, makes Oskar happy, but is this truly a good thing? They go off happily into the sunset, Oskar presumably destined to the soul destroyed shell of a person that Håkan had become, butchering humans to provide Eli with food for the rest of his life. People often talk about how the “happy ending” is sweet, and almost cute but think about it: it’s almost chilling! Essentially, Oskar has happily swapped the misery of childhood bullying for a fate that will truly be hell on earth and it feels nearly depressing as you know as he happily smiles in the films last shot that he doesn’t have a clue what’s going on. Remember, this boy is 12. He’s doing it because he has fallen in love with Eli, but he doesn’t know what her plans are for him. Did/Does she even really care?

Ultimately, Let The Right One In is a very quiet and patient film. It’s main points involve focusing on the progression of friendship between Oskar and Eli first. Unlike what you’d think when you think “vampire”, this is a beautiful and tender story – despite the overthought out process above. Despite its dark undertones, the film never feels sinister. Even during it’s highly enjoyable climax, it retains its heartfelt love.

Both Oskar and Eli are wonderfully drawn characters. Both young actors are emphatically true to their characters, making them all the more sympathetic. Through out the film, Director Thomas Alfredson shoots them in muted tones, as in – from their point of view, instead that of an adult. Reminding us, these are still kids [just in adult situations] He uses very little music, allowing the crunching of snow, the grumbling of their stomachs, the ambient sounds of the world around us instead to frame the action on screen. It’s something that hasn’t been done in this way before, and for that – I love it. The movies were made to tell stories like these. Unfortunately, I have not read the book the film is adapted from, but it certainly would expand on much of what is only hinted at here. But if you’re only going to see the movie, you don’t need any expansion. This is such a wonderful film as it stands today, in its boldness, its darkness, and its touching beauty.

If you like vampires, but you’re also a sucker for love stories, then I implore that you please watch the masterpiece that is Let The Right One In. It’s such an important piece of cinema: it does have subtitles – being a foreign film, but do not let that turn you away. If you manage to get a chance to see it..take it. It’ll trap you in a world where you feel the connection between two seemingly innocent children. If you have an idea for the next weirdo’ween review please let me know which movie[s] you’d like to see next! If you found yourself to enjoy this particular review – and want to see more – then take a minute and follow me over on my Facebook page [it’s at over 120+ likes almost at 130!] By clicking that “like” button, you’ll see every post from warrenisweird the very moment it’s been posted online; as well as links to articles and pictures/videos that will not be featured here on the blog. Every “like” helps me a ton, giving me the ability to write more posts for you to read, so be sure to tell the horror enthusiast in your life to do the same, and share The Facebook Page with your family and friends! Join me tomorrow when I talk about weirdo’ween #11! STAY TUNED!

THANKS FOR READING.

because NOTHING is scarier than the loss of innocence: “WELP” / “CUB” [2014]

If you’ve been following warrenisweird for a while now, you should probably know that I receive “screener” copies of movies in the mail. One such screener I received recently was Welp – or in English – Cub: a movie I had been looking forward to since it was first announced through a crowd-funding campaign. Now, after finally getting a chance [after my first day at my new job, today] to sit down and watch this, I feel the need to talk about it – because this film is different than most foreign films I’ve watched lately; and I mean that in the best way possible!

Cub revolves around a 12 year old cub scout named Sam, a very over-imaginative child who has a ‘violent history’, and tends to get bullied by his fellow cub scouts. [and even the cub leaders!] The film revolves around Sam and his fellow scouts who are all out on a camping trip [during what seems to be the summer] when He decides to head off into the back woods to find something – or someone – he’s fairly convinced he will find in the wilderness: a monster- like boy that the scout leaders describe as “Kai“…and he does.

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[NOTE: just a little ‘badge’ that I will be posting in my reviews starting now – this way, people won’t complain when spoilers come up!]

The thing is, even the locals know to avoid the remote part of the woods where the Cubs set up camp, which the group is forced stay at after finding their [original] booked campsite occupied by some dirt bikers. Unbeknownst to them, they’ve landed in an area filled with sensors and booby traps operated from an underground lair by a sinister man known only as “The Poacher“, and watched under the watchful eye of the feral boy known as Kai.

The film does a great job of showing an effective build up that nicely gives us suspense, humor and sometimes; even homage to other horror films. It’s only after the build up that all hell breaks loose. Even though the film is a now-gory action flick and is well handled, it feels like everything we’ve come to learn about Kai, and his Poacher-like father figure, just get tossed out the window.. We never really find out what the deal is with the Poacher or his young protege, and even though we get a hint at Sam‘s troubled psychology, it isn’t developed enough to make much sense to us as a viewer..

Arguably my favorite thing about this movie though, is it’s lack of innocence. The film itself proves that it’s not all happy camping for the kids whatsoever, as proven by the kids fighting amongst themselves, the adult guardians flat out swear and even threaten the kids at times, and worst of all; one of the Scout Leaders beats one of the other kids! It’s a dark, moody atmosphere that truly makes you feel like the woods are dangerous, and I’m not just talking about Kai.

While it isn’t a perfect film, it’s still an enjoyable experience that every horror fan should at least look into – if only to say that they did. It’s a thrill ride that has decently made effects, and some surprises that will impress the average viewer – that ending may come as no surprise, but I finished the film with a sense of wonder. So watch Cub, it’s definitely something that has enough horror elements to keep even a seasoned horror fan satisfied! If this movie sounds like your kind of thing, check out the trailer for the movie at the end of this post, and a quick fun fact: in the movie, one of the Scout leader’s cellphone rings, when it does; it plays the theme from Suspiria as the ringtone!

if you found yourself to enjoy this film review, please take a minute and follow me over on my Facebook page [it’s at over 100+ likes – only 15 more and we’ll have reached 130!] By clicking that “like” button, you’ll see every post from warrenisweird the very moment it’s been posted online; and I also share links to articles and pictures/videos that will not be featured here on the blog. Every “like” helps me a ton, giving me the ability to write more posts for you to read, so be sure to tell the horror enthusiast in your life to do the same, and share The Facebook Page with your family and friends!

THANKS FOR READING.

WAIT, DARIO ARGENTO’S SUSPIRIA IS GETTING A REMAKE?

suspiriasequelSuspiria is a strange film. Full of bright colors, gruesome violence and is set to a score that’s nearly as good as the movie itself; it’s beyond compare, and because of this – it’s one of those movies that after ‘experiencing’ it, you pray that it won’t get a remake.. The 1977 movie takes place on a stormy night, where an American dancer named Suzy Bannion arrives in Freiburg [but coming from New York] to join what she knows as a famous [and expensive] ballet school for a three year internship. Not even the next morning after her arrival, she is told [by the direction of the school] that a student she met earlier [leaving the school on the night she arrived!] was violently murdered and the police are investigating this crime. When Suzy becomes friend of another student, Sara, she quickly realizes that the school house is actually a coven of evil witches!

Back in 2008 though, Director David Gordon Green was actually planning on remaking Argento’s Italian horror classic for American audiences, [ughhhhh] but earlier last week, Green finally opened up about his original plan on his remake. This new information comes from a Crave Online interview..

But, at the heart of it,” Green continues, “I wanted it to be a horror film. And a horror movie, at the time when we were modeling that movie, meant you’re making Saw and Paranormal [Activity]. You were making these down and dirty, very gory, very economical movies. So the economic model for a horror movie was not where I wanted it to be to make a $20 million elegant movie from a guy who was an unproven horror director, you know?


The real question is though, is the Suspiria remake going to get off the ground now that “torture porn” as a genre has fallen, [good thing!]  and been way overused? One thing is for sure though, the most interesting comment in the interview is that there is a new version of the project is in fact in the works:

I’m actually hopeful that it’s happening,” Green said, “with a great Italian director that I had breakfast with last week.”

Last I remember though, Suspiria had a TV series being planned, rather than a large screen reboot; so at this time, are we getting both? Are we getting neither? Hopefully it’ll be the film reboot just because I can’t imagine the film as an ongoing series. [I feel that it almost doesn’t make sense..]


But what about you? Would you want a Suspiria reboot? Or are you still hoping for a TV series based on the movie? Let me know in a comment or two! If we are getting a movie, would you want it to be as colorful as the original? Or would you want a brand new vision? Also, If you found yourself to enjoy this article, please take a minute and follow me over on Facebook where you can click thelikebutton on my Facebook page. By clicking “like”, you’ll see every post from warrenisweird the very moment it’s been posted. I also share links and pictures that will not be featured here on the blog. Every “like” helps me a ton, giving me the ability to write more articles, so be sure to tell the horror enthusiast in your life to do the same, and share the page with your family and friends!

THANKS FOR READING.

film study: THE LOVED ONES is The PERFECT Valentine’s Movie!

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High school was[/is] a strange time wasn’t it? I know my time in school was “different” : what with all those teachers, my weird friends and awkward teenage romance. especially that awkward teenage romance.. Have you ever had a crush on someone, who didn’t like you back? That’s where The Loved Ones story begins.

The movie opens on a bright and sunny day, where one grade 12 student’s happy life soon changes.. While attempting to avoid what appears to be a blood soaked person walking in the middle of the road, Brent swerves his car around a tree, which ultimately ends with the accident killing his father. Unfortunately, Brent is constantly confronted by the guilt of his father’s death [and his mother’s emotional collapse] after the accident, so Brent escapes life with drugs and loud metal music to block out the pain and guilt he feels. However, he has one thing holding him to Earth; his girlfriend Holly – a grounded, caring, and loving individual with good looks; a perfect dream date for his high school prom…and then there’s a ‘special’ girl, known as Lola. Lola is quiet and awkward, but seems to actually have feelings for Brent: a lot of feelings. So many in fact, that she asks Brent if she’d go to the prom with her; which he politely turns down. [seeing as he’d be going with Holly] and that – that’s where it everything goes terribly wrong.

As it turns out, Lola is fucking crazy – making Brent the ‘Prom King’ at her own version of the prom, which includes: [but not limited to] a mirrored disco ball, pink satin, glitter, syringes, nails, and even power drills! The worst part is knowing that her father is involved with her torturous ways.. even helping her! Unfortunately, Lola thinks she’s doing something perfectly fine, and you learn that this isn’t the first time she done this – remember when I mentioned the blood soaked individual at the beginning? As it turns out, he was one of Lola‘s [many] “LOVED ONES”. The movie can feel like a slow burner at times, which isn’t a bad thing, but holy crap does it pay off nearing the end! With enough blood/gore to satisfy most horror fans, the quality of this film is insane!

the real problem is how attractive Lola is..

In the end though, I titled The Loved Ones as the perfect Valentine’s Day movie – and this is why: It’s not. In truth, it’s extreme, violent, and definitely a beautifully crafted film. The closest thing that could be considered “loving” about this movie is Lola‘s dedication to Brent and the other men she’s tortured, and ultimately – killed. It’s a wonder that Brent survived at the end, with obvious permanent memories of what he just went through: and Lola, who tries so damn hard to catch up to Brent when he makes his escape..when this happens. [spoilers, obviously]

So be sure to check out The Loved Ones this Valentine’s Day; with it’s slow burning story – which as I said, is not a bad thing – and an attractive [but psychotic] Lola, what could possibly go wrong? Would you go to Prom with her? I mean, if it meant your life..

“Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned”, am I right?

THANKS FOR READING.

[PS: just try to get the song “Am I Not Pretty Enough?” out of your head – I dare you..]

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