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WARRENISWEIRD’s Top 05 SCARIEST “Are You Afraid Of The Dark?” Episodes

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If you follow warrenisweird on Facebook, [which if you don’t, you definitely should] you probably saw this post referencing a TV show from my [very scarred] childhood: Are You Afraid Of The Dark? Along with shows like Tales From The Cryptkeeper and Goosebumps, this was a show that I used to watch almost religiously, even though it would give me indefinite nightmares after every episode. By sharing that one video clip on Facebook, I started to remember just how terrifying Are You Afraid Of The Dark? really was, especially for something that was marketed towards kids who were just getting into horror such as myself. I decided [against my better judgement] to delve back into the show and dig up past nightmares and make a list of my top 05 episodes [in no particular order] that I would argue are the scariest from my childhood, and to some degree, still are! As you can expect, spoilers will be involved with every submission below, so tread lightly if you are worried about finding out the “twist!”


Submitted For The Approval Of The Midnight Society, I call this story: WARRENISWEIRD’s TOP 05 SCARIEST “Are You Afraid Of The Dark?” EPISODES


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“The Tale Of The Captured Souls” [Season 01]

Starting off with the “not so scary,” we have an episode from early in the series that follows Danielle and her family’s lakeside vacation that [almost] goes dead wrong! When Danielle and her family arrive for their holidays, they meet a strange man by the name of Peter: the abnormal [and young] inn keeper. The inn itself is also strange, covered with mirrors that shock whoever touches them because of, as Peter says, “old wiring.” [Because everyone knows that mirrors are usually wired, right?] During their stay, Danielle and her family begin to feel drained, and notice more than a couple new grey hairs growing on their heads. Eventually, we learn that the [wired] mirrors from before are actually part of a more elaborate plan to drain the inn’s guests of their souls, which will effectively keep Peter forever young. What doesn’t help is when Danielle stumbles upon Peter’s “graveyard” – a place where he keeps a collection of all the souls he’s stolen over the years. After Danielle discovers that Peter is behind everything after discovering his “soul-sucking lab.” Peter offers a truce: he will give Danielle the chance to join him in his quest for eternal youth. As expected, she instead destroys his bizarre science project; which ends with him becoming an old and ancient man, saving her parents from having their souls taken.


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“The Tale Of The Super Specs” [Season 01]

If you were a big enough fan of the series, you probably remember Sardo’s Magic Shop. It was a plot point of many of the “Tales” that revolved a “magic/mystical item.” While a lot of the items were unique – and sometimes terrifying – none of Sardo’s “tools” were as traumatizing as his “Super Specs.” That’s where this episode comes in. While wearing the Super Specs, Mary Beth is given the ability to see things that aren’t really there. These “things” can range from a tea kettle whistling on the stove to figures cloaked in black. Soon enough, she learns that these specs have been cursed with a “second sight,” which opens a window into an alternate dimension. After explaining the situation to Sardo, he agrees to help Mary Beth clear her home of these dark visions, but his lack of experience in magic [irony?] ends up causing a “cosmic imbalance” which grants the [dark] creatures full access to our world. What makes this episode so scary is that it ends with our hero’s demise, which if I’m honest, is a lot to take in for a kid.


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“The Tale Of The Ghastly Grinner” [Season 04]

If you have been a follower of warrenisweird for a while now – or you know me in real life – you are probably aware that I have an irrational fear of clowns. This particular Tale did not help that cause.. In the picture above, you are looking into the eyes of this entry’s villain, The Ghastly Grinner: an evil comic book character bent on making life for a young boy [Ethan] a living hell. Like most days in the early 1990s, it all started when our “hero” went to the opening of a new comic book store in town. [back when the days were easier] The store’s owners offered him a “one-of-a-kind” comic which featured the monstrosity above, who causes people to laugh uncontrollably and spit up blue goo.. [Gross! Why Nickelodeon?!] Before putting his new [and rare] collector’s item with the rest of his comic book memorabilia, Ethan accidentally spills a glass of water on it. Instead of cleaning the mess up like a normal human would, he decides to microwave the comic book.. because, of course he does. Bad news for Ethan though, because the radiation [somehow] brings the comic book villain to life! After The Ghastly Grinner starts freaking people out all over town – including a young Warren who cannot look away from the TV – Ethan decides [responsibly] to take matters into his own hands by creating a new comic book; in order to defeat The Grinner. Somehow though, he manages to get trapped inside the comic, thus bringing him face to face with the gut-busting villain.. Although this episode is more silly than anything, The Grinner himself scarred me like any – and every – clown before him. That reason alone earns it a spot on this list.


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“The Tale Of The Dead Man’s Float” [Season 05]

Oh yes, that episode. The one from what I shared on Facebook. [see beginning of post] This Tale centers around Zeke, a geeky teenager who yearns to get close to a girl by the name of Clorice, [wait! Is that a chlorine pun?!] the super-cute captain of the swim team. In exchange for helping with her chemistry homework, she decides to give him swimming lessons. [definitely a fair trade as far as I am concerned!] Naturally, Zeke is eager to impress her, he takes her to their school’s abandoned swimming pool [which, for plot reasons, is mysteriously still filled with water] to begin his “lessons.” But this specific pool has been hidden for a good reason: It was built on top of an old graveyard, and now the spirits are angrier than ever! That’s when we meet the zombie/skeleton hybrid above. Don’t worry though, because in the end, Zeke uses his super-chemistry skills/nerdiness to defeat the evil skel-zombie, he gets the girl, and even learns how to doggie paddle!


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“The Tale Of Laughing In The Dark” [Season 1]

ANOTHER CLOWN! And worst of all, this is the episode I remember the most! [it’s also only the second in the show’s history] This final Tale takes us back the Great Depression, when a scheming Zeebo The Clown decides to steal some cash from the carnival’s payroll. While on the run, he hides in the fun-house, which proved to be a mistake as he then accidentally burns it [and himself] to the ground with his cigar ash. Years later, the carnival rebuilds the fun-house, placing a dummy of Zeebo inside as a memorial to the clown who died inside [reminder, the guy robbed them! ..I don’t get that logic either] Flash forward to the 1990s,when a little punk of a kid named Josh decides to swipe the Zeebo dummy’s nose as a way to prove he isn’t afraid of his town’s local legend: the fun-house is haunted. But he should be. Because soon he is visited by the ghost of Zeebo, who begins terrorizing Josh at home, at school, and even making threatening phone calls. On a happier[?] note, The clown got his nose back at the end of the episode. However, a clown who laughs in the dark is no friend of mine!


Of course there are so many other episodes I could have covered in this list – 91 episodes total – that I probably forgot some of the more important ones! Which episode of Are You Afraid Of The Dark? scared You the most? If you liked this post, let me know in the comments below! [In the future, I may just do a Goosebumps version of this list!] As always, if you find yourself to enjoy what I do on here, then please take a minute and follow me over on my Facebook page [we’re at over 180+ likes – let’s get to 200!] By clicking that “like” button, you’ll see every post from warrenisweird the very moment it’s been “gone live” online; and I also share links to articles and pictures/videos that will not be featured here on the blog.

Every “like” helps me a ton, giving me the ability to write more posts for you to read, so be sure to tell the horror enthusiast in your life to do the same, and share The Facebook Page with your family and friends! I’ve also been writing way more reviews on my Letterboxd account, this is because I’m trying to review every single movie I watch  – with each review [usually] coming the very next day after viewing! Are you interested yet? Check me out over there and click that “follow” button! I’m just bound to follow you back because I like reading other people’s thoughts on film, as well as writing reviews myself!

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THANKS FOR READING.

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warrenisweird’s top 05 winter-themed horror movies

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Walking home from work this morning, I quickly realized how cold it’s getting outside. Being in Canada, I have no doubt in my mind that sooner than later; there’s going to be snow on the ground – and I’m not excited for it. I’m not a fan of feeling like an ice cube: so seeing frost on the ground, and seeing people all bundled up, makes me feel like I’m halfway to frozen. That being said, it also caught my attention that there’s actually a few horror movies that take place in the winter, or at the very least; during Christmas. Since it’s that time of year, I figured this is the best time to talk about some of my personal favorite winter horror movies. Just remember: if these movies don’t give you the chills, the weather outside will

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No, I don’t mean that film..Frozen is a film by a Director I hold most dear: Adam Green, and Frozen is arguably one of his best. It’s eerie, it’s atmospheric, and in case you couldn’t tell: it mostly all takes place on a ski lift. The best part is that it mainly focuses on only three people – but that’s enough to give you fright from high above, especially when the ski lift shuts down for the night…and you’re still aboard. [check out the trailer here]

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Rare Exports is a film I was late to seeing because of how ridiculously  difficult it’s been trying to find a way to watch it. It makes this list because it fits both bills: it takes place around Christmas and it’s in the winter – though being from Finland, it would be snowing.. Rare Exports takes us to the depths of The Korvatunturi mountains, where 486 meters in the ice we find the closest ever guarded secret of Christmas, Santa Claus. It’s a dark film that definitely has a different spin on the holiday season. [check out the trailer here]

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Arguably one of my favorite films ever, The Thing is a movie that shouldn’t be taken lightly. It’s unparalleled in the way it presents fear in the snow. Even if it could be could technically be categorized as sci-fi as well, I feel like this movie is more horror. It follows a group of scientists in the Antarctic who are forced to face a alien that seems to assume the appearance of the people it kills.. [check out the trailer here]

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One part vampire story, full on horror. 30 Days Of Night is a film I watched on a whim when it first came out, only to be presently surprised at how much I enjoyed it. The only thing I knew about it, was that it was based on a comic and that there was vampires. Like The Thing above, the movie takes place in Antarctica, where for one month during the year; the sun doesn’t come out..naturally, this is perfect feeding time for vampires. It’s creepy, and shockingly more gory than expected! [check out the trailer here]

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Consider the following: you see your parents get murdered, and as a result you have to stay at an orphanage.. where you’re abused by the Mother Superior. Would this make you a killer? Cause this is exactly what happens to Billy in Silent Night, Deadly Night. [check out the trailer here]


So what have we learned today? That the cold isn’t the only thing that can be considered dangerous this time of the year? That, Santa does exist, he’s just Frozen in the mountains? I guess the real lesson learned here is that Christmas is just around the corner [ugh, I know..I’m not happy about it either – so much snow on the way!] but we have to think positive: family gatherings and free food! [okay, the family gatherings don’t sound as fun as they did in my head]

What’s your favorite Christmas horror movie? If it isn’t related to Christmas, what’s your favorite horror movie that takes place in the snow? Although one of my personal favorites, Let The Right One In didn’t make the list, it’s only because I’ve talked about it extensively on here. But seriously: let me know in a comment your favorite, and we can compare!

Also, If you find yourself to enjoy what I do on here, then please take a minute and follow me over on my Facebook page [it’s at over 125+ likes – only a few more and we’ll have reached over 130!] By clicking that “like” button, you’ll see every post from warrenisweird the very moment it’s been posted online; and I also share links to articles and pictures/videos that will not be featured here on the blog. Every “like” helps me a ton, giving me the ability to write more posts for you to read, so be sure to tell the horror enthusiast in your life to do the same, and share The Facebook Page with your family and friends!

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[if you can tell me what this screenshot is from, you’ll win my love!]

THANKS FOR READING.

warrenisweird’s top FIVE cemeteries in horror movies!

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Cemeteries have always held an air of creepiness to them: they are places where we bury our loved ones, giving them a final resting place. Sometimes, the place manages to creep you out because of the way it looks – all decrepit and broken down – but, there’s a reason the Fantasy and Horror genre tend to like this setting. In these cemeteries, it is almost always night and often, the moon is full, for extra supernatural points. Fog is usually a contributing factor, and more importantly, the dead aren’t ‘really dead‘! I mean, some horror movies revolve around being in a cemetery! But as expected, not all film cemeteries are created equal; many are pretty standard, boring versions of what is supposed to be granite tombstones and black, but bland backgrounds. But every so often, we get a glimpse at what seems to be a truly spectacular collection of mausoleums and even more headstones, sometimes with familiar names engraved on them! Or maybe I’m just overthinking this whole thing. Either way, this is warrenisweird‘s TOP FIVE cemeteries, in horror movies. As with all my list posts, this is entirely an opinion piece – if you disagree, or have preferred horror movie cemeteries, be sure to leave a comment with your favorites!


Night Of The Living Dead [1968]

Because of course I would be adding this movie! Esthetically, this cemetery isn’t really isn’t anything spectacular that makes it stand out, but the scenery around it is very nice..especially for wandering zombies – even though we never really see one come from inside a grave! In real life, this location is known as Evans City Cemetery, and if you find yourself curious, this website compares the film and the cemetery as it stands today!


Braindead [1992]

often referred to as the goriest film of all time, Braindead strongly deserves that title. It’s extremely gory, even for a film that doesn’t take itself too seriously.. Even the scene above shows that Peter Jackson was a master at making gory horror flicks in his early days as a Director.


Nightbreed [1990]

You know what I like more than slasher films? Monster movies; specifically – movies like NightbreedThe movie follows a troubled young man, who is drawn to a mythical place under a cemetery called Midian. In Midian, he quickly learns that there are a variety of monsters are hiding.. from the humanity above. After Hellraiser, I fell in love with Clive Barker‘s work, and Nightbreed confirmed it.


Drag Me To Hell [2009]

Say what you will, but I actually really enjoyed Sam Raimi‘s return to horror with Drag Me To Hell; it was dark and gritty, it had the slapstick humor that Raimi is known for, and most importantly – it had a really dirty cemetery scene..which I loved. If you enjoyed Drag Me To Hell, let me know in a comment! I can’t be the only one..


Army Of Darkness [1992]

Speaking of Raimi, who could forget the scene in this movie when Ash forgets the ‘magic’ words from the Necronomicon? it’s funny, it’s slapstick silly, and it’s probably the most memorable cemetery on this entire list! And that’s saying something!


So what have we learned today? Besides the obvious, cemeteries aren’t always made the same in movies. Sure, they are the birth place of the hoards of the undead, and in the case of a Zombie Apocalypse, expect every grave to be a “Clown Car Grave“. As with most of my ‘list’ posts, there is literally thousands of different cemeteries I could have mentioned for this list. Hell, I’m sure I’m going to get comments asking why this cemetery wasn’t added or this one; and I’ll quickly realize that I didn’t even consider/think of that one! So now I ask you: what is your favorite horror movie cemetery/resting place? Did I mention it above? If not, let me know in a comment or two! I’d love to compare lists!

Also, if you found yourself to enjoy this article, please take a minute and follow me over on my Facebook page [it’s at over 100+ likes – thanks so much!] By clicking “like”, you’ll see every post from warrenisweird the very moment it’s been posted. I also share links to articles and pictures/videos that will not be featured here on the blog. Every “like” helps me a ton, giving me the ability to write more posts for you guys to read, so be sure to tell the horror enthusiast in your life to do the same, and share the page with your family and friends!

THANKS FOR READING.

TOP FIVE MOTHERS IN HORROR [HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY]

Oh, Mom – You were the woman who held us in your womb for nine [long] months. You are the woman who fed us and shushed us when we cried.. But unlike these Mothers; you seem to have actually cared.  Unlike the ones in horror films and TV shows that have gone and given us a look at the dark side of motherhood over the years.. It’s kind of strange in it’s own right: there’s no horror film called “Father’s Day” ? But yet there are many that revolve around vicious killer Moms. Because I have to work tomorrow, here’s my Mother’s Day post – my top 5 mothers in horror.

NOTE: Amelia from The Babadook was going to make this list, but I felt that since I already wrote up a post on the film, I’d set her aside. Be sure to read that post, over here.


MARGARET WHITE – CARRIE

They’re all going to laugh at you if you think that Piper Laurie as Carrie‘s mother isn’t the most extreme holier-than-thou mother I’ve seen in a while, making her one of the most frightening parents in horror history. She has a notoriously bad habit of abusing her daughter, proven by the fact that she’s under the impression that her very existence is wretched sin! Margaret even goes so far as to force her to recite certain passages from the Bible,  lock her in a closet, and endlessly torments her until she finally fights back with her telekinetic powers.. Well, she did have it coming after all this..right?


PAMELA VOORHEES – FRIDAY THE 13TH

Anyone who calls themselves a horror fan knows that in the original Friday The 13th, Jason wasn’t the killer [yet] but rather, his mother. According to the plot of the film, Mrs. Voorhees was furious about the oversexed teens who neglected her son as he ultimately, drowned in the nearby Camp [Crystal] Lake. That grin is as terrifying as any old hockey mask!


AMANDA KRUEGER – A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 5: THE DREAM CHILD

Like Jason before him, we learn in the fifth installment of his famous series that Freddy also had a mother of importance. We learn that during her time as a nun, Amanda Krueger is locked inside the Westin Hills Asylum with dozens upon dozens of inmates, where she is raped, repeatedly, which ends in her pregnancy. She does give Freddy up for adoption and tries to follow him from a “safe” distance, and to her credit, she even tries to stop him, but realistically, trying to defeat a boogeyman that haunts your dreams is a nearly impossible task; even if you are a woman with divine connections..


ROSEMARY WOODHOUSE ROSEMARY’S BABY

Watch out for those neighbors. It doesn’t help when you find yourself living in a questionable apartment building where strange events seem to occur almost daily and suspicious people give weirder explanations for those events. Then you get Rosemary and her husband, who become players in the plans of what seems to be a Satanic cult! In the movie, Rosemary has what she believes to be a dream of being raped by a demonic being..except it wasn’t  a dream!


NORMA BATES – PSYCHO

you can’t say you didn’t expect this one on the list: when I think mothers in horror, Psycho is bound to be the first film you would probably think of.  We hear her speaking to him the whole film until we learn that Mother was more or less “created” by Norman’s psychotic cross dressing episodes; Only to be horrifyingly revealed as a skeletal corpse stashed away, fully clothed and all in the cellar!


With so many Mothers being so vicious, it’s a wonder any of these people prospered..albeit – into killers – but still. If there’s any lesson to learn today, it’s that even if your Mother grounded you as a child, she’s not nearly as bad as someone who asked you to kill for her, or at least she didn’t lock you in a closet! Which horror Mom do you think is the scariest? is it Mrs. White? Or do you sympathize with Mrs. Krueger, seeing as it’s technically not her fault that Freddy turned out the way he did? Let me know in a comment or two below or on Facebook!

Also, on an closing note, if you found yourself to enjoy this article, please take a minute and follow me over on Facebook where you can click the “like” button on my Facebook page. By clicking “like”, you’ll see every post from warrenisweird the very moment it’s been posted. I also share things that will not be featured here on the blog.  So be sure to tell the horror enthusiast in your life to do the same, and share the page with family and friends!

THANKS FOR READING.

[Mother’s Day Horror by chrisraimoart]

FIVE Pokémon that are secretly TERRIFYING

From working a ton, to visiting friends [this guy, and this guy] and family [out of town, which is why I’ve only been posting on the Facebook page, rather than here lately] – I’ve been a fairly busy guy this past week. But when I got home Monday night, I didn’t want to jump on the computer and type away, so I decided to take a blast to the past and play Pokémon Heart Gold on the 3DS; which I got as a gift from one of the above said friends.I completely forgot how much I love the games [I grew up playing Pokémon Blue and Red] with the cute characters, the battling mechanics, and most of all – the “gotta catch ’em all” feelings you get when you throw that famous Pokéball : it’s all around good natured, child-friendly fun.. Or is it?

Let’s quickly recap, in case you have been living under a rock for the past 15+ years or you haven’t played the games, Pokémon is a long running video game series where your objective is to collectively ‘catch’ over 600 creatures and make them battle each other to level up and “evolve” them to stronger monsters. If you’re against the whole animal cruelty thing, you can alternatively have them participate in contests, judging their beauty with different accessories on them, and so forth. I guess it’s also fair to mention that in the game, you leave home at the age of ten to find and “train” these wild monsters..

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[relevant to this blog’s Pokédex]

Now the reason this post is titled “secretly terrifying” is because although it’s marketed to [ten + year old] kids, many of the Pokédex – an electronic ingame Pokémon encyclopedia – entries are creepy as fuck.. like morbidly creepy. It makes you wonder how some of these slipped past game-censors, and how parents would feel if they knew what little Tommy was playing with..To make this list easier, I have included a picture of the “creepy Pokémon“, and added it’s Pokédex entry [also stating which game the entry is from]. So grab your Pokédexes, and let’s have some nostalgic fun, shall we?


Kadabra:

Pokédex Entry: It happened one morning – a boy with extrasensory powers awoke in bed had transformed into Kadabra. [as per Pokémon Fire Red]

Starting off with one of the more what the fuck moments in the very first Generation of the series, Kadabra is already kinda spooky looking. But to know that this “pocket monster” was once human makes it downright terrifying! If that’s not enough, Kadabra has a similar look and feel to Baphomet – the Freemason’s god. In all seriousness though, this basically tells us that trainers who have one of these, are “training” a child..to battle monsters..to the death. yup.


Yanmask:

Pokédex Entry: Each of them carries a mask that used to be it’s face when it was human. Sometimes, they look at it and cry. [as per Pokémon Black]

Based on this particular entry, we’re introduced to a pretty deep – yet messed up concept as if it was completely normal. According to this, humans [and trainers alike] can die and ultimately turn into Yamasks. If that’s not bad enough, it basically gets humiliated by losing it’s entirety of its human body except the fucking face: WHICH IT THEN CARRIES AROUND AS A MASK!!


Haunter:

Pokédex Entry: It’s tongue is made of gas. If licked, it’s victim starts shaking constantly until death eventually comes.. [as per Pokémon Silver]

It’s one thing that Haunter‘s tongue is made of gas, I mean it is a ghost – but to know even the slightest of touch will kill it’s enemy? that’s dark..even for what we’ve seen already. The above entry doesn’t even try and deny that fainting is just a term used for death in the Pokémon world! The scariest part of this creature is that if you remember the TV show, during the opening theme, Haunter actually licks Ash‘s Charmander: what does that tell us? the shaking is clearly visible..[check it out here]


Darumaka:

Pokédex Entry: Darumaka’s droppings are so hot, people used to put them in their clothing to keep themselves warm.. [as per Pokémon White]

Although cute, Darumaka is a strange creature; even by Pokémon standards. In a world where all of society seems to only care about pocket creatures that are constantly beating each other up – which seems to be the norm amongst kids – the concept that people are putting scalding hot monster feces in their pockets to “keep warm” is probably the most fucked-up thing on this list – and that’s passing the fact that some Pokémon hold their dead face around.


Cubone:

Pokédex Entry: It always wears the skull of it’s dead Mother, no one has any idea what it’s hidden face looks like. [as per Pokémon Silver]

Hard to believe that as a kid, Cubone was actually my favorite Pokémon, I loved it’s design, it’s move set and even it’s evolve form [Marowak, which has the deceased Mother’s skull fused to it’s face] it blew my mind as I grew older to know that it’s skull mask isn’t a “mask”.. This Pokémon is more depressing than any, and I still love Cubone.


Obviously, there’s more than just these five Pokémon that can be classified as “terrifying”. There’s many psychic types that even go so far as to kidnap kids, or even eat their dreams! And that only marks seven total – out of over 600! But now I ask you: which creepy critter is your favorite? Did it make this list? Let me know in a comment or two! Also, if you found yourself to enjoy this piece, please take a minute and follow me over on Facebook where you can click the “like” button on my Facebook page. By clicking “like”, you’ll see every post from warrenisweird the very moment it’s been posted. I also share things that will not be featured here on the blog.  So be sure to tell the horror enthusiast in your life to do the same, and share the page with family and friends! The page only needs FIVE more “likes” until we’re at the 100 mark! [there will be a celebratory post when it’s reached!]

THANKS FOR READING.

TERROR IN THE SNOW: top 05 horror films from CANADA!

canadianhorrorAlthough it’s not the first thing you’d think of when you’d think of my home-country of Canada, [I tend to think “snow”] we actually make a lot of horror films! The best part is that many of them are recognizable by a larger set audience – even if you didn’t know they were made in Canada! We have had some of the best films the horror genre has had to offer, and that’s why I feel like I want to talk about Canadian horror. Specifically, five of my favorite horror films made here in the White North. Be sure to stick around, cause you never know if you’ll be surprised at some of these Canadian gems! Not surprisingly, many of the films on this list were filmed either entirely, or in part, in Toronto, Ontario.


SPLICE :

Splice was a weird, albeit exciting film about two young scientists who are told by their employers to quit their research on splicing together DNA. Although they swear that they’ve stopped the work, they secretly continue their work, but this time with human DNA. Filmed mainly in Toronto, Ontario; Splice also was filmed – in part – in Hamilton: just outside of Toronto.


SILENT HILL :

based on the video game of the same name, Silent Hill didn’t get the attention it deserved; since a lot of gamers found the story to be incorrect, or just terribly adapted. As a fan of the games myself, I actually found the movie refreshing – giving the sleepy town of Silent Hill a new spin. Like Splice, this movie was mainly filmed in Toronto, Ontario; but also had scenes shot in Winnipeg, Manitoba!


TUCKER & DALE VS EVIL :

arguably my favorite horror-comedy in a long time, Tucker & Dale VS Evil is a film everyone that enjoys the horror genre should see at least once. It’s funny, it’s vicious, and it’s got heart. I won’t explain what happens in the film, because it’s best going in blind – let’s just say I was told about the film, I watched it on Netflix, and then promptly ordered it..like immediately after seeing it. The film was shot entirely in Alberta.


VIDEODROME :

one of my more favorite films on this list ever since I bought a shirt from Fright-Rags with the same image above printed on it. [order that shirt here!] Videodrome is probably the weirdest thing you’ll see on tape/dvd/bluray. It’s a film you have to watch more than once to “feel” like you understand it – even if you don’t. It follows a sleazy TV programmer who begins to see his life and the future of media spin out of control when he acquires a new kind of programming for his station.. It was filmed in various sections of Toronto, Ontario


AMERICAN MARY :

I’ve talked about it before, I’ll mention it again, Mary Mason [above] is extremely hot.. like, ridiculously. The Soska twins definitely grab my attention every time they cast Katharine Isabelle in one of their films, her acting is just as good as her looks. American Mary is no different: It’s gory, it’s entertaining, it’s even a little sad by the end of the film. Totally recommended. Unlike many of the other choices on this list, this film wasn’t filmed in Toronto, but rather Vancouver, British Colombia!


Obviously, there are a dozen and one other Canadian films out there, I just decided to mention my favorite five. Hopefully this list showed you that there are actually well known movies that were made in the Great White North, especially big named movies such as Splice or even Videodrome! Because there’s so many more Canadian horrors, I may just have to a part two to this list. But only if there’s enough demand for it. What Canadian Horror film is your favorite? Tucker & Dale? maybe even Silent Hill – or, is it not mentioned on this list? Let me know in a comment, below! Also, if you found yourself to enjoy this piece, please take a minute and follow me over on Facebook where you can click the “like” button on my Facebook page. By clicking “like”, you’ll see every post from warrenisweird the very moment it’s been posted. I also share things that will not be featured here on the blog.  So be sure to tell the horror enthusiast in your life to do the same, and share the page with family and friends!

THANKS FOR READING.

Give Foreign Horror a chance! warrenisweird’s top 05 FOREIGN films:

When it comes to brutality in foreign horror, there are two types of fans: The first type will see a trailer or even a GIF online and giggle to themselves for a minute before coming to the conclusion of, “I NEED to see this wacky, and over the top gore-fest NOW!”, They’ll go to their local movie store, [I’m not the only one who still buys movies, right?!] grab the unrated copy, and rush home to go on a insane roller-coaster ride of utter brutality for 90-some minutes!

and then there’s the second type: These are the ones who also love what they’re seeing on their screen, but something will jump out at them. Specifically, the use of subtitles. To these horror fans, the very thought of having to read subtitles while watching a film makes them shudder. With a feeling of dread washing over them as they wonder how bad the dubbed voices will be this time.. I can see where you’re coming from, but unlike you, I was never really like this, [having the closed captioning on as a kid, being as I have deaf parents helped] but often times; the laughable dubbed versions of otherwise amazing movies felt like the film was [for lack of a better word] ruined. There would be some kind of infernal wish there was just some way for the real acting to shine through the bad dubs. I’m not trying to say all dubs aren’t great, but let’s face the movie facts, here: something will always “feel” off when you’re watching an actor’s lips move, but the words are out of sync with their screams! [..I mean dialogue] Somewhere, in the process of changing from their natural accent to English, the characters in the film you’re watching loses their natural charm.. it’s as if you’re no longer watching the actor[s] giving their body and soul to their job; but more like of a bad ‘out of body experience’.

In some of the more extreme cases, some horror fans will even go so far as to shy away from foreign horror entirely, just to avoid the terrible voice overs and the need of having to read subtitles, and in my opinion, this is the worst thing you can do as a horror fan: limit your horizons. In the list I’m going to share below, I’m going to try and make a case for subtitled films, and try and find a way to make those Type twos make the switch over to accepting subtitled horror for what it is: I’m going to present you with my personal 05 favorite foreign films you NEED to watch with subtitles, as always – these films are in no particular order.. and please, don’t let the subtitles scare you away!

 

Battle Royale:

Battle Royale is Kinji Fukasaku‘s adaptation of a novel about a dystopian society where the Japanese government kidnaps a class of middle-school students and puts them on an island.. the twist is that on that island, these students have only 3 days to slice, dice, shoot, and stab each other to death until only one student is left alive! If they try to escape though, [or if more than one student is alive at the end of their time limit] the explosive bomb collars that are placed around each of their necks will detonate, causing an obvious mess!

[check out the trailer for Battle Royale]


I SAW THE DEVIL:

I’ve talked about it before, but this is easily one of my favorite foreign films: though it could be considered more thriller, I Saw The Devil follows a secret agent who blurs the line between good and evil in his pursuit of revenge.. it’s brutal, it’s insane with it’s acting, and the climax is just mind numbing!

[check out the trailer for I SAW THE DEVIL]


Dead Snow:

this movie had to make the list, especially after watching it’s sequel, Dead Snow 2: Red vs Red [expect a review on Letterboxd soon!] last night! Dead Snow follows a group of medical students as they find themselves confronted by an unimaginable evil: Nazi zombies! It’s cheesy, it’s gory as hell, and it’s Norwegian!

[check out the trailer for Dead Snow]


Audition:

Arguably one of the more “realistic horror” films I’ve seen in a long time, Audition is beyond fucked.Without giving too much away [it’s more of an experience, rather than a movie] Audition follows a widower. this widower reluctantly agrees to an offer to “screen girls” at a special “audition”, which was arranged for him by a friend to find him a new wife. However, the girl he ends up liking is not who she appears to be..

[check out the trailer for Audition]


Inside:

coming from France, Inside is one of the more fucked up films on this list. It follows a woman on the brink of motherhood Four months after the death of her husband, is suddenly attacked in her home by a strange woman.. who just happens to want her unborn baby.

[check out the trailer for Inside]


Obviously, this is just five of many different foreign films: from zombies to crazy women wanting unborn children; if I’ve learned anything from watching foreign films, it’s that they don’t hold back the terror/violence. Hopefully by the end of this piece, you’re more open to watching subtitled films.. because they’re a marvel to behold! If you enjoyed reading this piece, head over to Facebook and click the “like” button on my page. By clicking “like”, you’ll see every post the moment it’s been posted; if that’s not convincing enough, I also share things that will not be featured here on the blog, and be sure to tell the horror enthusiast in your life to do the same!

THANKS FOR READING.

warrenisweird’s top five “final girls” in horror

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I’ve always been a sucker for the “final girl” in horror films: she generally comes off as the scared/weak one but ultimately decides to face her fears to destroy the bad guy once and for all. From Sidney in the Scream franchise to Laurie from Halloween, there’s been a fair share of bad-ass women in horror, especially in the last few years. Another important part of the trope is that the “final girl” is usually super attractive, which is not a bad thing at all! [with Laurie and Sidney being no different to this “rule”] However, since today is known to Internet users as “#womancrushwednesday” and we’re talking about women in horror, I figured I’d combine the two and make a short list [consisting of five] of some of my personal favorite “final girls”. [which follow the tropes above — yes, even including the “attractive-ness” of the women, so guys: take note!] I’ve also included the trailers to the movies the girls are from, cause y’know.. just in case you were curious enough to check their respective films out for yourself!

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Starting off with a character from a movie that I had to watch a couple times to fully appreciate: Erin from You’re Next. This movie follows a couple who are visiting their family during their parent’s anniversary. however, when they sit down to eat dinner, they are attacked by men in sheep, wolf, and other animal-like masks. Erin makes quick work of the masked men, even after learning the reasoning of their arrival — did I mention she’s Australian? check out the trailer for You’re Next here.

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We all know Nancy from A Nightmare On Elm Street so it’s no surprise she’d end up on this list. This “version” of Nancy is from the older Elm Street films, as she’s much older than the younger version of herself that gets licked by a telephone [while talking to Johnny Depp no less!] Nancy is always near the top of my list when it comes to “final girls”, anyone who can “pull” a killer out of her dreams to try and kill him off is enough to get my vote! haven’t seen this classic? check out the trailer for it here.

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Chances are if you have been following warrenisweird for a while now, you would know that Cabin In The Woods is probably one of my favorite horror films from the past 10 years.. if not my absolute favorite. Therefore, adding Dana was a given since she’s so extreme — only Dana would shoot one of her best friends to save humanity. [even if she didn’t go through with it] it’s also worth noting that the first time we see her in the film, at the beginning, she’s in only a t-shirt and panties: score! [thank you, script writers!] exciting enough? check out trailer for this movie here.

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Choosing another character from a movie I absolutely loved from recent horror comes Mia, our addicted turned Demon [Deadite, anyone?] from the recent Evil Dead remake. Mia has a tough time in this film: from addictions to cocaine, to turning into a demon, to dying; Mia went through a lot. If that wasn’t enough, she even goes so far as ripping her own arm off [from under a truck] to save herself from a Demon, only to shove a chainsaw in it’s throat: which goes so far as to make the sky bleed. damn.. if you think that sounds insanely violent, you should check out the trailer — here. [you might have to sign in due to age restrictions..sorry about that one, kids!]

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My final choice is one some may not know, but should definitely watch when given the chance: Mary-Beth from Hatchet II and Hatchet III. from shooting Victor Crowley in the face [multiple times too! as in, until he was a gooey mess!] to beating him repeatedly — with her bare fucking hands, Mary-Beth is someone I’d totally want on my team if I were facing a crazy swamp man with a hatchet face. If that isn’t enough to sell you on her, Mary-Beth even joins a guy by the name of Reverend Zombie [who ultimately turns out to be a bit of an asshole by the end of part III] check out the trailers for Part II here, and then Part III over here.

[writer’s note: please take note that by watching both trailers, you’re agreeing to possibly seeing spoilers in both trailers to the first Hatchet film]


Obviously these are just a few of the many “final girls” in horror films: they all fall into their own category, and for that — I applaud them. So how about you, dear readers?? who are some of your favorite “final girls”? Do they fit some of the typical tropes? leave me a comment or two and let me know! be sure to find me on Facebook and give me a “like” there and to share with all your horror-loving friends!

THANKS FOR READING.

warrenisweird’s TOP 05 monsters from “Cabin In The Woods”

I’ve said it on here before, I can say it a million times – I absolutely love the movie CABIN IN THE WOODS! It has monsters, it has comedy, it even has Thor [but not as Thor] as one of the mindless teenagers who gets himself into trouble. Being as it’s October, I figure there’s no better time to talk about one of my all time favorite monster-flicks, and talk about the monsters in it! The best part of the film is obviously with the  monsters during the scene with the elevators when all hell breaks loose. However, even based on the betting board [which can be seen in the post I made about the film herethere’s a lot of monsters in the film, almost too many to mention: and only then do they finally appear during the purging scene!

From Werewolves to Aliens to Goblins to fucking Unicorns, there are a ton of different types of beasts in this film. Hell, most of them are references to other films/monster flicks! In this post, I’m going to share my TOP 05 monsters in the film. You just may be surprised by who you see on this list. READ ON!


that’s…something else.

For the first one on this list, you can’t go wrong with some mutants. They have the look of the zombies from 28 Days Later don’t they? Even if they aren’t the absolute worst on this list, I’d hate to get caught by one of those guys – cause that’s just fucking gross..

what a beast..literally.

The Dragonbat was something I honestly didn’t expect to be shown, primarily because it wasn’t bet on during the whiteboard scene. However, when it does appear, it certainly pays off! It looks fucking amazing on-screen and I could only wish it got more screen time.

The thing about these Doctors is that they are clearly insane. they’re blood-splattered, they look like their skin has been removed, and they are just all around look disturbing. They aren’t shown for long, but they are seen relatively quickly, about to ‘operate’ on someone. Points for being creepy, guys!

Another monster that deserved more screen time were the dismemberment goblins! Seen only briefly during the ensuing chaos, they are seen for a split-second driving a cart around, while people are tying to escape. What makes them so special is [as seen above] there seems to be two types: a red one and a green one. Whether there is a difference or not, I suppose we’ll never know.

before you jump at me about how I despise clowns, give me a minute to explain why this one is on the list: This is a list about monsters, clowns give me the fucking creeps, and if you have seen the movie, you’ll know that this clown is invulnerable to bullets! If that’s not fucking terrifying, I don’t know what is. fuck this guy for scaring me!


Now that’s only five of the total count of monsters in this film. While I could have gone on forever, these are just some of the scarier beasts found in the movie Cabin In The Woods. Some honorable mentions can be found below [with pictures – click the name –  for reference]

Which was your favorite monster? Was it the Dragonbat? or was it even the Unicorn? Maybe your favorite wasn’t even listed! [I’m sorry if that’s the case!] Let me know in a comment or two, let’s talk about it! Join me tomorrow for my next post: this time, about a film not many people enjoyed: [but of course, I did..] 2012’s Sinister.

THANKS FOR READING.

warrenisweird’s TOP 5 HORROR ANTHOLOGY FILMS!

Initially, this post was going to strictly be about a certain film that I absolutely love to watch around this time of year, [I won’t mention it by name, since I’ll be using it anyway] but that changed pretty damn quick when I realized that there’s more than just one horror anthology film that I enjoy. Therefore, I’ve hereby decided that for this post, there won’t be just one film mentioned, but five! I’m going to jump right into it, so hold on to your guts, cause these are my top five horror anthology films! [but obviously, in no specific order]

Let’s start off on a film I knew almost nothing about: V/H/S/2. I had seen the first V/H/S film and I can’t lie, I wasn’t overly impressed by it. I understood what it was, and what it was trying to do: but it didn’t really phase me, as it just felt strange. However, when I saw the second installment, I was blown away with the quality of it, the fucking insanity that the film [as a whole] was, but most of all – the genuine creep-out feeling I had in my stomach during Safe Haven [as depicted above] was just too real, I was amazed at how well the story was executed. Bring on V/H/S/Viral

Creepshow is one of those films that deserves so much more love because it’s so damn unique to anything I’ve really seen up until now: plus being made by George A. Romero and Stephen King ? Sign me up! The best short is easily the one Leslie Nielson, titled Something To Tide You Over. Creepshow 2 was also fairly good, and worth a watch as well!

If you follow me over on Facebook, you should totally have expected this one to come up: Trick ‘r Treat. It’s one of my favorite Halloween films as it takes place on the holiday, and has a bit of everything for everyone. Even the spirit of Halloween shows up [appropriately named “SAM” for “SAMHAIN”] which is a definite plus. Can’t forget the fact that Anna Paquin shows up as a super-hot werewolf. I mean, check her out here!

They just don’t make movies like Tales From The Crypt anymore. Before the classic HBO series [which I wasn’t aware lasted over 7 seasons!], there was this film: It wasn’t like the show at all since it was mainly about a bunch of weirdos sitting around while the Crypt Keeper [but not the one you’re thinking of] makes them explain, and tell their dark secrets to one another. Although not as awesome as the show, this film is worth watching.

I can’t deny the fact that this one is a bit of a cop-out, since I technically haven’t seen it yet: ABCs Of Death 2. However, based on the trailer [and the post I made about it here] it looks about 100 times better than the original film. As I said in the post, I wasn’t really a fan of the first; I felt that the director’s got away with a lot that some shouldn’t have [can you say “P is for PRESSURE”?] however, the trailer for this one makes it look fantastic, at least in the sense of being better than the first!


So here we have not one but five Anthology films that I recommend. While I’m not entirely sure if they’re all available on Netflix, [or Hulu, or what have you] I can say with certainty that they are enjoyable enough to deserve a viewing. I also want to apologize for the delaying of posts occasionally, [especially lately] something happened in my personal life [Stephanie and I are fine, I swear!] and it’s taking some getting used to, hopefully it passes sooner than later.

THANKS FOR READING.